In Part 2 of this series, we looked at how to drop judgement of yourself and others.
Here is the second in a set of 4 steps you can explore to progress your journey to discover your true self and ultimately to become invincible.
Step #2: Drop the Strive For Perfection
Perfection only exists in your mind.
One person’s idea of perfection is totally different to another person’s viewpoint. When you strive to be perfect, it’s often because you feel unworthy and feel the need to prove that you are ‘good enough’ to others. This is a self-imposed illusion – the pressure you place on yourself trying to be ‘perfect’ is really only so that you can prove to yourself that you are good enough in order to stop feeling unworthy.
When you drop this self-imposed pressure you’ll also ease up on those around you. An example of this is a pushy parent that’s always pressurising their child. Nothing the child does is ever good enough, criticism, not praise awaits no matter what. If the parent delved inside and looked at their own inner landscape, they would most likely find that they’re living out their own insecurities through their child. If they made peace with their own short-comings, they would probably stop being such a dictator.
As with dropping judgement, this is not an instant fix, it’s done with baby steps over time and a gradual change in your perception of yourself. You could begin here:
- Stop comparing yourself to others – that’s the fast route to self-destruction and more feelings of unworthiness.
- Consider this thought: everyone else is involved in their own race to be ‘good enough’ and believe it or not, are often viewing YOU as their own benchmark of perfection.
- Think about the people in your life that you truly love and enjoy spending time with. Do they ever mess up? Is everything they do absolutely perfect? Does every single area of their life have a green ‘Tick’ of perfection next to it? If you answered ‘No’ to any of these, then of course, they are not perfect, but you love being with them anyway… apply that thought to yourself and how people must feel being around you despite your imperfections.
- Imagine being around a person where seemingly everything about them and in their lives is perfect, they always do and say the correct thing and never mess up anything – how annoying would they be to hang out with? Wouldn’t they seem fake, almost inhuman and robot-like? Would you really WANT to be that person?
The truth is, you are ‘perfect’ exactly as you are with all your ‘imperfections’… wow, who knew eh!?
Of course, setting sights high when looking to achieve a goal is a very useful tool and will often result in a better than expected result. That’s a different situation to the self-sabotaging, ‘I’m never good-enough’ mindset being addressed here.
Read Part 4 in this series now to learn Step #3 in your journey to authenticity.
To learn more about the power of vulnerability, read Brené Brown’s ‘Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead’, click here.